Sunday, January 9, 2011

She's a vogue kinda girl...

   It's true, I love reading the usual celeb gossiped filled mags or the typical hyped female mags you see on the newsstands; but what I really take the time to read and even subscribe to are magazines like Vogue or Harper's Bazaar. I love to look at the fashion and read about the fashion; not to mention they do feature a few good articles. These are not your typical run of the mill magazines, you'll hardly find the steamy articles about how to give your lover the top 10 most mind blowing whatever or silly mishaps people encounter with the opposite sex. Nope, these magazines will center around the fashion world and have (in my opinion) some really good pieces about life outside the mundane. If you haven't ever picked up one of these magazines, I say give it a try. You might find yourself surprised.
  Lately, I've been harping on this idea that sometimes people seem to try a fit into a mold that might not be them. Well, as I'm reading an article in Vogue, they had an excerpt from this book that tackled this issue. I found myself relating to this woman, despite our differences. The major one being she was a mother and she was tackling the huge issue of being the perfect mom and living up to the standards of her society's norms. I couldn't help, but think, honey we're all in the same boat. Some of us are just having to live to other norms, depending on their age or the society they live around. So as this piece addressed how dangerous it could be to try and mold ourselves into something that we may not be or could never be; I was thinking why the heck are people so obsessed with being something we're not. Easy, because we see it as something beautiful and our human nature is attracted to beauty or having things that seem desirable. It makes sense, of course people want what seems greener on the other side. But, at the price of losing who we are? Of course people would love to have the ideal, 9-5 job with the white picket fence and cozy home filled with the idealistic mom/dad combo with kids, not to mention Fido, carpool, PTA, play-dates & family game nights--because thats what everyone tries to have. But, who the heck filled that idea into our heads that this is the ultimate ideal??!! I know there are tons of people out there who may not want any of those things much less half of them. So, why do we force feed everyone to want to have those goals? 
  I don't have the answer and maybe never will. But, I do think we need to stop and think about what we really want for ourselves in this life. Remember, we only get one and why are going to live a life you maybe don't really want. Life is short, but we need slow down and take the time to figure out what we really want. I know I was headed into a sealed deal life not too long ago and I didn't even realize it at the time I wasn't ready. I thought I was ready, 100%, but that was because I'd made myself think I was; just because society made me feel that was what I wanted. I've lost a really good friend along the way too, all because I was obsessed with what society deemed as the perfect life goals. So, remember, as you go through this life and you come to major life choices--who's life are you leading, societies or yours? Who's choices are you choosing, yours or societies? 
  I can say at this moment, I'm living my life through what I want. For instance, this month I've decided to dedicate this month to my best friend who passed away almost a year ago. I decided that I wasn't going to look at his birthday or the mark of his yearly passing as something sad, despite how I may feel (not that I'm not going to let my self feel sad for missing him, because that is something I need to feel, to heal over his passing). I am going to honor this whole month in his honor, by doing his favorite things, from movies, food, and even adventures. Some people may find that weird and kinda on the morbid side, but it's my life and it makes me happy. Sure, that may not be the answer for everyone one who faces a situation similar to mine, but it works for me. I'm also secretly looking to relocate myself to a bigger city and contemplating running a small business (pastry/cafe/bookstore?).  I love the small town life, but my current small town life is way to far from the big city and I need some big city adventures. Some people who look at my current life situation may think, you should probably be on the search for the perfect husband and trying to settle down into having a family. But, I still want to do so much before all of that and I need to decide what kind of family life I'd like to have. Do I want my family to consist of the normal mom/dad/children combo or do I want to adopt and be a single mom? If I can't answer those questions with a definite answer, I'm not ready for that life. I'm barely starting my life and I have a lot of time to settle down and start a family in good time. Find your happiness no matter how much different it may be than others definition happiness. Peace & <3 always...
"People take different roads seeking fulfillment and happiness.  Just because they're not on your road doesn't mean they've gotten lost.  ~H. Jackson Brown"


"Well," said Pooh, "what I like best," and then he had to stop and think.  Because although eating honey was a very good thing to do, there was a moment just before you began to eat it which was better than when you were, but he didn't know what it was called.  ~A.A. Milne

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